Just a very quick update here to let everyone know that yes, we are still alive and fresh new content is coming soon.

First, I have finally defended my thesis this past Tuesday and for some reason the University is going to give me a M.Sc. degree in Biology.

Second, I got a job as the lead designer/developer for the University of Waterloo Nanotechnology Institute. What does that have to do with biology you ask? Nothing. Jobs are pretty slim in science these days but fortunately for me I have a pretty good skill set in computers and designing.

Third, we’ve been in transition mode for the past month and a half it seems but we’ve finally settled into our new house in Waterloo. Unfortunately, going to the bank with a pocket full of student loans doesn’t go to well in asking for a mortgage so we’re renting for now, which makes perfect sense. We can’t afford a mortgage on our own, but we can pay someone else’s mortgage plus a little extra for their profit. Anyways…

So, things are settling down now so you’ll start to see some new content (and a new design) in the next little while so stay tuned!

We missed you guys!

Odum is feverishly finishing his Master’s thesis and will defend it before March. So as a result we are moving. Where? you ask. Well that’s the million dollar question. Odum has to get a job first so we’ve both been job hunting for him. So not only is the poor guy writing a thesis he’s also looking for job. And I am trying to get our house packed up since we have to be out of here by March. Let me tell you how fun that’s been with two crazy kiddos running around!

In addition to all this, Tristan has IBI therapy at least once a day, sometimes twice. We found out he has yeast overgrowth in his tummy, so we’ve been doing an anti-yeast protocol, which requires three different supplements (making the grand total of supplements ten!) that have to be taken at different times during the day. And he started a playgroup at Kidsability with three other kids with ASD. The result is a huge blossoming. Tristan is now onto three word phrases, he has been incredibly affectionate with everyone, especially Maya and he is playing functionally with his toys. It’s incredible to see this change in him.

Maya is also a going concern, back at the end of November she decided that at 16 months she was ready to drop her nap, so no down time for me during the day to attend to blogging and all it encompasses. The up side of this is that she finally started sleeping through the night, and it only takes about half an hour to get her down, giving me more time at night. She is blossoming as well, new words every day, playing with her Little People house, and asking “What’s this” about everything she lays eyes on. It’s wonderful!

I’ve also been contemplating the tone of our blog, as I’ve realized that most posts are about autism and not too many about going green. And I’ve felt a bit bad about that, seeing as the blog is called My Green Family. But right now our life is so centered around autism I really don’t have time to write well thought out, well researched posts about green living. Make no mistake we do live as green as we can (we still don’t have a car!! and we’re making an attempt at a veganish lifestyle) I just don’t have time to write about it. Talking about autism and sharing our journey is more my focus right now. I recently met another mom who is just about where we were with Tristan a year ago. They don’t have a diagnosis yet but she was really interested in what we were doing with Tristan and the success we’ve had. I realized that it would have been great to have another mom to talk to when we started out on this journey. About what happens at assessments, at appointments, what different bio-med protocols are like and other things to expect. So that’s one of the things I’m going to endeavor to write about, that and talk about some autism related issues, like the neurodiversity movement.

So that’ s been our 2010 so far, whew! I hope yours has also started out well!

One of the biggest traditions in our house was always the food. Turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes and turnip (my mom makes amazing Finnish turnip, the recipe has been passed down for generations). This year we’re staying at home so I’ll be in charge of our big Christmas meal. And due to Tristan’s diet restrictions and picky eating this tradition will be a bit different. I’ll be doing chicken breast instead of a turkey, cause I know Tristan will eat it. Dressing will be made from gluten free bread, potatos made with rice milk and not cream and no turnip since I don’t know the recipe yet and I really haven’t developed the palate for turnip yet.

Gifts are another tradition we’ve changed a bit. We don’t go crazy with presents for the kids, see my Story of Stuff post for an explanation. But we did get them both toys they can both play with, an advantage of having two so close in age! We also put a bit more thought into Tristan’s gift as we wanted to make sure he would play with it appropriately and not just use it to line up with his other toys, but really play with it. And for Odum my gift to him is more thoughtful and not just some random store bought thing, I’ll fill you in later.

We’re also going to incorporate some sort of activity into our Christmas day and not just make it about pigging out. Since we love hockey we’d eventually like to do a big family pond hockey game. But until the kids can skate we’ll settle for a nice walk on the trail near our house and maybe a toboggan ride.

There are many more ways we could have greened our Christmas this year. We need to get LED lights for our tree, we should have used an alternative for wrapping paper, we could have bought the kids toys that were eco-friendly, I could make a vegan Christmas dinner. But, (I know I know everyone always has an excuse) with three different therapies going on for Tristan and having therapy everyday of the week, not to mention making sure Maya doesn’t get lost in the shuffle or feel neglected, its been difficult to take the time and make better, greener more eco-conscience decisions about Christmas. We do the best we can with what we have right? Next year we’ll do better, we have to!

So from our family to yours have a happy holiday and may all your Christmases be…green!

Andrea, Odum, Tristan and Maya

Took the kids to the Toronto Zoo and they loved it! The Great Barrier Reef exhibit was the big hit as well as the elephants.

We received a grant from Presidents Choice Children’s Charity for Tristan for IBI therapy. So we’ve been running around getting assessments done, interviewing therapists and getting things organized.

We’re starting up speech therapy again and we came off the waitlist for occupational therapy and start this week.

Maya’s walking, running, climbing, talking, getting ready to be potty trained, and just generally getting into everything and keeping me on my toes! She is so precocious!

Me and my best buddy climbed all 144 flights (1700+stairs) of the CN Tower. And we did it in 45min!!

And we’re still on the bikes (thank goodness it’s been a nice fall) so everything takes a bit more planning and a bit more time. Getting two kiddos ready to go in the Chariot for a bike ride should really be an olympic event!

So that’s what’s been going on with us for the past little while but things are starting to slow down now and I have lots of stuff I want to talk about! So stay tuned!

So I’ve decided to share my list with you.

Here are the things that I am thankful for this year:

• I am thankful for my son. Tristan is my hero. He gets up with a smile on his face everyday. He has taught me more about life and love in his three years with us than I have learned in all the 29 years of my life.
• I am thankful for my Maya. Maya is my sunshine, her smile never fails to make my heart sing. She has an inner beauty and strength I can’t wait to see develop. As I am my mom’s, she is my kindred spirit.
• I am thankful for my family. I am thankful for my parents’ and siblings’ unending love and support, for being an ear to listen and a shoulder to lean on. I am thankful for so many rocks on this climb.
• I am thankful to have incredible girlfriends. Even though one is far I know I’m not far from her thoughts as she isn’t far from mine. And the one who is close has been such an incredible cheerleader I don’t know what I’d do without her encouragement. You both know who you are.
• I am thankful for my husband. To have someone that so completely and utterly gets me and adores me anyways is an indescribable feeling.

• And last but certainly not least I am thankful for the people who read this blog. Thank you for taking the time to share our journey with us and comment. To know that we have people cheering us on and supporting us even though we’ve never met is really cool and humbling. Thank you!

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

Tristan was an unexpected gift. I was just waiting to find out if I had gotten into teacher’s college when we found out I was pregnant. Little did I know I would be a frosh at the University of Mom. It was the shock of my life. But once we got over our fears Odum and I where so incredibly happy.

My pregnancy with Tristan was so perfect. I enjoyed every minute, well maybe not so much the 50 lb weight gain, but it was such an easy pregnancy. The labour and delivery, not so much. Odum and I were playing Lego Star Wars when contractions started the evening of the 6th of September. They continued into the night, getting more painful and then by noon the next day we went into labour and delivery (L&D). I was only 1 cm dilated so they sent me home. By this time I was really uncomfortable. We ordered pizza and put in a movie and tried to get through each contraction. By around midnight we decided to go back to L&D. This time we left all my bags in the car, you look like such a noob carrying it back out when they send you home. Again I was only at 1 cm and the nurse said Tristan was posterior so I was having back labour and that’s why the pain was so intense even though I wasn’t very dilated. She said to take some Tylenol, drink some chamomile tea, and take a bath. I don’t think she’s ever been in labour, none of that helps. At all.

I really don’t remember much of the next day I was just living through the time between each contraction at that point. But we finally went back to L&D and the nurse from the first time I was there was with us. She took pity on me and did a stretch and sweep and got me to 3 cm and they finally admitted me. I had so badly wanted the Demerol they offered me and had an intense argument with Odum about getting something for the pain. Oooo I was so mad at him as one of my good friends says “no uteurus, no opinion”. I am really glad he pushed me though; he was the best labour coach. When they admitted me I got a second wind and started labouring in the whirlpool tub in the birthing room. The tub rocked, if I could I would have had a water birth, it’s so relaxing and really helps with the pain.

So time went on and on and on and it was about 9 pm the night of the 8th and I was spent. All I could think about was I wasn’t going to have anything left when it was time to push. I hadn’t slept in two days, I hadn’t ate and had just thrown up bile, mmmmm. So I begged for the epidural. Ahhh I could have married that anesthesiologist, I’m sure that guy gets proposed to multiple times a day. So I was still at 3 cm so they broke my water gave me oxytocin to help get things going and nothing. Nothing was happening. The obstetrician on call came in, said she was going to give me another hour and if nothing was going on it was c-section time. So the hour came and went and into the operating room we went.

They strapped my arms down and prepped me and I started shaking like a leaf. That was the worst part of the whole experience, that uncontrollable shaking. And then after lots of tugging and pulling, Tristan was born. He was perfect, crazy cone head and all. All that labour had been worth it. I would do it again in a heartbeat. As soon as I saw him I knew him, I saw his heart and knew he would do wonderful things. Three years later he’s already done fantastic things.

Just going through that labour made Odum and I much more solidified in our marriage than I could have ever thought possible. He went through every contraction with me and never gave up, which gave me strength to continue. He sat beside me and held onto me while I was in surgery, something I was so terrified of going through.

In the last three years I’ve become a better person because of Tristan and a better mom. I have discovered things about myself I never would have known without him. The bond that Tristan and I have is indescribable and I see a lot of my personality in him (poor kid). We’ve fought a lot of battles together and I know we’ll all fight many more. When I look to the future I see nothing but success for Tristan.

Happy birthday my little Nemo.

So this is just a quick post to let everyone know that Andrea is working on a real juicy two part post that will establish the following:

• Autism can be caused by contaminants in our environment and therefore we are responsible for the dramatic increase in autism in our children by our lifestyle choices.
• Autism, in some cases, can be cured.

More details to come so keep an eye out for this post as it is sure to be an eye opener! In the mean time, please take a moment to vote in our poll and don’t forget about entering our contest to win $50 towards books of your choosing!

So the day of the section came and I was so nervous. Being awake during surgery is such a weird thing. To make matters worse I ended sitting on the operating table for almost an hour waiting for my OB/GYN, as usual. Let me tell you how nerve wracking it is to be looking at all the instruments they are going to use to open you up! So finally the Dr gets there and then proceeds to have a power struggle with the anesthesiologist. He didn’t want to give me the spinal until she came in and she wouldn’t come in until I was frozen. All I could think was, seriously people just get this kid out of me!

I was very sick throughout my whole pregnancy with Maya: all day sickness for most of the pregnancy, heart burn that made me throw up and acid reflux. So it was only fitting that I threw up one last time. There was something about the spinal that didn’t sit well with me and I threw up big time while they where operating. Throwing up when you’re on your back is gross! Thank goodness for Odum, he held the bowl for me and cleaned my hair, now that’s love. When they finally pulled her out I was so excited and emotional. I was so excited she was a girl; I think every mother looks forward to that mother daughter relationship. And I got to hold her right away, with Tristan I was shaking so bad I couldn’t hold him until about an hour after he was born. It was pure bliss to look into those beautiful eyes. All I remember thinking was, oh its you, like I knew her all along. And she was so tiny 5lbs 14oz, I was afraid they wouldn’t let me keep her with me because she was so small. We named her Maya Ada Kay. Maya means princess, Ada is a Nigerian name to honour Odum’s Nigerian heritage, and Kay is for my grandmother. Her name was Kathleen but everyone called her Kay. She was one of the best women I have ever known. I love her name and it suits her.

Even though she’s only been here a short time I can’t imagine my life without my daughter. She is the most beautiful baby (besides Tristan) I’ve ever seen. She is my sunshine, she always has a smile on her face and is so precocious. She is a daddy’s girl through and through and has had Odum around her little finger since birth. She loves Tristan so much and is always trying to keep up with him. And she never gives up on him, he’ll push her and she’ll go back for more. I feel so lucky to be her mother and able watch her grow into the beautiful woman I have now doubt she’ll become. Happy Birthday my princess.

I’ll take a step back here and fill in some gaps from last fall to now. We were beginning to become worried about Tristan’s lack of speech development in the fall and by Christmas time we where waiting for him to be assessed for this speech delay. The thought of autism had never even entered our minds. About a month later we decided to take Tristan to an ear, nose and throat doctor to rule out any possible hearing problem that could be causing his speech delay. I of course did a ton of research and found a few studies indicating that a milk allergy can sometimes cause fluid build up in the inner ear causing mild hearing loss. In that moment a light bulb went off since Tristan had suffered from infant colitis: he was allergic to the milk products I was eating when I was breastfeeding him and I had to stop eating dairy. So from that moment we decided to put Tristan on a dairy free diet.

Yet another month later I saw a discussion on my favorite message board about whether special diets could change behaviour in children. What sparked the discussion was a short documentary called Autism Yesterday which talked about the gluten free casein/dairy free diet and how it was helping kids with autism recover. I responded indicating I definitely saw a difference in Tristan when we took him off dairy. He was less in his own world and made much more eye contact with us. These were two symptoms we were really starting to notice and worry about before we started the diet. I also watched the documentary. I have never been more frightened in my life than I was after watching that video. Tristan’s behaviour was strikingly similar to the children with austim in the video, it was hard to watch. I knew in that moment that my baby had autism.

I began to do intensive research, so much research it felt like I was about ready to defend my PhD in autism spectrum disorder. I researched everything on autism, possible causes, symptoms, potential treatments, and especially this special diet and why it seems to help so many kids with autism. I was shocked at what I had discovered. Of course long before this I had heard all the controversy surrounding autism and vaccines being the cause. But I ignorantly brushed it off as people simply looking for someone or something to blame. I couldn’t have been more wrong, or uninformed. It wasn’t just vaccines that these parents where blaming but toxins that run rampant in our air, water and food. From pesticides on the lawns to genetically modified organisms in our food all this crap causes toxic overload in our kids. And some kids just can’t take it all; Tristan is one of those kids.

Could it be possible that this disease is treatable, that kids can recover and live “normal” lives? Could it be possible that the things that are meant to protect us and make our lives better could actually be harming our children? If so should we do something about it? Don’t we have to do something about it?

After all these events and after all my research we both knew how important this blog was going to be to us. Not only as a means to inform people how easy it can be to become green for the sake of our environment and children, but also as means to communicate, share and learn from others as we journey through this maze that is autism.

Andrea and I have been together for almost 10 years, and for the last 3 of those years we’ve shared our time with our two wonderful children, Tristan and Maya. We’ve been through many obstacles, and more often than not they led to some pretty hard times. But despite our hurdles we’ve always managed to support and love each other and we pulled through, together.

And together we now face our greatest challenge of all. Tristan, a few months removed from his third birthday, has recently been diagnosed with autism. Our once clear and defined path has been transformed into a clouded maze filled with uncertainty, fear and anger.

I know that our journey will not be easy. I know there will be difficult times ahead. But I also know that all of us together can look down our path and turn our uncertainties, fears and anger into determination, confidence and strength. I also know that there is no one else I would rather travel down this road than with those closest to me now.

I love my family more than anything, Maya for the smile that never leaves her face, Tristan for the incredible bravery he displays each and every day and Andrea for her unconditional support through everything we face together.